Over the weekend, I read the post The Pain of Disability by Kerry at Transcending CP. (You’re following her by now, right? She’s an amazing 19-year-old, former preemie and is a triplet who has CP and the gift to write). In her latest post, Kerry shared the hurt she has caused her mother. I had a visceral reaction to the post. I wanted to respond, but it wasn’t working from my phone, so instead, I emailed myself and am posting that message here. In short, I wanted to hug Kerry and I wanted to hug her mom and I really wanted Kerry and Owen and Jack and US Boo and UK Boo and Tucker and every child with special needs to know this:
To my child with special needs,
It’s my honor to be your parent. I hate what you have had to go through…but you know, for ME, I wouldn’t change a thing. Every day, I see a miracle take place. I see something happen that maybe shouldn’t have. To be apart of YOUR life. I am privileged and couldn’t be more proud.
I won’t deny it, you will see that I have hurt. Seeing an innocent child go through what you have had to go through…and the struggles you will continue to have…that’s hard for a parent to accept. To know that I’m the parent and powerless to make it…for YOU…all go away. Yes, that has hurt. However, YOU did not cause that hurt.
And, whatever hurt I have felt is far surpassed by the joy of each moment I get with you. Watching you try, watching each of your successes – big or small – celebrating how far you have come; that, my child, I wouldn’t change for the world.
YOU have not caused me any pain. YOU are amazing and have shown me a joy, I’ve never before knew existed. YOU have made me a better person.
EVERYDAY, I am thankful to be your parent.